Comfort and Joy (Naughty or Nice) - Selina Brody, 2010 Advent Calendar - Naughty or Nice

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Selina Brody
Comfort and Joy [2]
“I
CAN
’
T
believe you are thinking about going through with
this.”
Randy pulled to a stop at the intersection, turning to
look at the man next to him in the car. “Why? It was a good
idea two years ago, when we decided to do it, and it’s still a
good idea, Bentley.”
The blond next to him shifted on the leather seat of the
luxury sedan, wishing he had taken off his suit coat before
getting in the car. Running his fingers through his classically
styled hair, he sighed. “Two years ago things were different.
You had Jason. The two of you made this decision together.”
Silence answered his comment. Randy accelerated,
taking the on ramp to the GA 400 heading north from
Atlanta. “It’s a big decision, Randy. Possibly the biggest
decision a person can make. I can’t help but think you are
doing this as a way to hold onto Jason,” Bentley continued.
“We’ve already had this conversation, Bentley. I wanted
it then. I want the same things now. Nothing has changed,”
Randy stated.
“Everything has changed!” Bentley waved a hand
around. Randy was scheduled to get on a plane at ten the
following morning. It was his last chance to get him to
change his mind. “Then you were in a committed, long-term
relationship. Now you’re alone. Then you were talking about
bringing a child into a two-parent home. If you do this, you’ll
be a single parent. That’s tough in the best of circumstances,
Selina Brody
Comfort and Joy [3]
and you’re bringing an adopted child from a foreign country
into a family with a single gay parent.”
Bentley raised his hand to ward off Randy’s reaction to
his statement. “And don’t tell me it doesn’t make a
difference. You know it does. Especially to kids. You don’t
even speak the same language, for fuck’s sake. Couldn’t you
have picked a kid from a country that speaks one of the ten
languages you know?”
Randy took a deep breath. His voice sounded soft but
steady as he answered, “This was the only adoption agency
willing to consider an application from a single man. Even
countries that will consider single parents usually restrict
them to women. Ironic, isn’t it? I was so frustrated over the
fact that Jason and I couldn’t adopt as a couple, but having
to be approved as a single parent is what is allowing me to go
pick up our son.”
“Did you hear what you just said?” Bentley asked,
watching Randy’s face. The farther north they drove, the less
light illuminated the interior of the car. “Our. Our son. Jason
is gone, Randy!”
Randy’s hand slammed into the steering wheel of the
car, making Bentley jump. His friend was a pacifist and
rarely got angry. “I know that, damn it! I was there,
remember?”
Bentley could see the tears running down Randy’s face
and felt sorry he’d pushed. More than fifteen months ago,
Jason had been in a fatal collision with a drunk driver on
this very road, coming home late from work. A group of kids
out partying all day on Lake Lanier had crossed over the
median and hit him head on. Jason had made it to the
Selina Brody
Comfort and Joy [4]
hospital but had never regained consciousness. He’d died
the next day.
Bentley reached out to put his hand on Randy’s
shoulder, half-expecting his friend to shrug it off. Taking a
deep breath, he gentled his voice. “I know and I know how
hard losing him has been. I just want what is best for you.”
“I know that, Bentley, but I’m not jumping into this on a
whim. Jason and I thought long and hard about adopting
and everything it meant, but it wasn’t just a joint decision. It
was a personal one. I want to be a father. I want to have a
family. I’m forty-two years old. If I don’t do this now, if I wait
until I find someone new and we are together long enough to
decide we want to have a family, no adoption agency will
approve me. I barely squeaked in under the age limit as it is.
This is my chance, Bentley. My one chance. And I’m taking
it.”
R
ANDY
settled into the first-class seat, shaking his head at
the offer of a drink or snack. Pulling his laptop out of its
case, he stuck it in the seat’s back pocket to use after
takeoff. Twenty-two hours and a single stop in Brussels was
the best flight he could find, so he’d have plenty of time to
write, read and at least try and sleep. He wasn’t sure if his
long run of sleepless nights would work to his advantage by
making him so exhausted that he’d finally sleep, or if his
brain would continue to spin out doubts and recriminations
and prevent him from resting.
His biggest worry was that Bentley was right.
Am I
ruining a young boy’s life by uprooting him and bringing him
Selina Brody
Comfort and Joy [5]
into a situation worse than the one he’s leaving? Will I be a
good father?
He knew he wasn’t through grieving for Jason,
but life wasn’t giving him the option to wait. He felt almost
like fate was telling him to get off his ass and move on.
Signaling for the flight attendant, he asked for a glass of
water, digging a bottle of pills out of his carry-on. His doctor
had prescribed sleeping pills after Jason’s accident, but
Randy hadn’t taken any of them. He cradled the small blue
tablets in his hand before tossing them into his mouth and
downing them with a swallow of water.
He needed to sleep.
He needed to stop his brain.
For better or worse, he was doing this, and it would be
best to face it after a few hours of sleep. Turning his face
toward the window, he looked at his reflection. Sun and
laughter had made their mark, but he still looked younger
than his years. Letting sleep pull his eyes closed, he
wondered if he’d ever smile again.
“M
R
.
M
ALLORY
!
Mr. Mallory! This way… this way please.”
The small Indian man, dressed in white, cotton slacks and a
loose, pale blue shirt, motioned for him to follow.
The press of people and noise felt intimidating. Randy
kept falling behind because he’d pause to let someone cross
in front of him and end up blocked by a solid stream of foot
traffic. He had traveled extensively all around the world, but
he’d never been so bowled over by the colors and smells. He
felt an almost overwhelming urge to unpack his camera, but
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Comfort and Joy (Naughty or Nice) - Selina Brody, 2010 Advent Calendar - Naughty or Nice

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